29 Aralık 2008 Pazartesi
Saudad...
28 Aralık 2008 Pazar
new project - Yeni projem
This is my new project... Can you see it? İt's on the frame at right side. I don't know how for now but I'll have a website next year (2009). And I'll show my photographs there. Do you have any idea to make it easy and cheap way?
Oh... I wish you a lately merry xmas :)
Love you all
Eveeett...
İşte yeni projem. Görebiliyormusunuz bilmem ama çerçevenin sağ alt köşesinde bir ibare var... Şimdilik nasıl yapacağımı bilmiyorum ama 2009 yılı içinde kendime ait bir websitem olacak ve fotoğraflarımı orada sergileyeceğim. Bunu en kolay ve en ucuz şekilde nasıl yapacağım konusunda bir fikriniz varsa lütfen bana yazın...
bizim için de geçmiş kurban bayramı kutlu olsun :) biraz geç kaldım ama olur o kadar...
Herkese sevgiler...
21 Kasım 2008 Cuma
a brief history of past days (or months!), Gecmis zamanin kisa bir ozeti
Nereden baslasam nasil anlatsam bilmiyorum ama uzun zamandir yazi yazmamamin elbette ki makul bir sebebi var : tembelim ben... Ama bugun Mireia'dan iyi bir azar yedim ve ev odevi olarak blog yazma gorevi verildi bana, ne de olsa 2 gundur evde yatip duruyorum hem de Madrid'de !!!
Oncelikle kaldigim yerden devam edecek olursam; kitabi biraktigim vapurda her gun gozlerim kitabimi aradi, ya da okuyan birini, ya da buraya gonderilecek bir mesaji bekledim ama gordugunuz gibi hic biri gerceklesmedi. Sanmayin ki vazgectim, eve doner donmez yeni bir kitap yola cikacak, Mireia'nin saclarinin diken diken oldugunu gorebiliyorum (bu arada bunu ingilizceye nasil cevirecegim de bir merak konusu oldu simdiden)...
Kinaliadadaki gizli kumsalimiz, secret beach
Belki biliyorsunuz ama ben bilmeyenler icin tekrar yazayim, mayis ayinda basladigim hudut ve sahiller saglik genel mudurlugundeki gorevime genel mudurun degismesi nedeniyle veda ettim ve eski calisma yerim olan Baltalimani Kemik Hastanesine geri dondum. Resmi yazisma ile gecen 1 ay boyunca da rapor aldim (sakin kimseye soylemeyin). Yani eylul ayi boyunca tam 1 ay evdeydim !!! Bu sure zarfinda buyuk bir gercegi farkettim; "calismak insan dogasina aykiri". Cok ciddiyim, insanin sevmedigi bir iste calismak zorunda olmasi buyuk bir haksizlik. Gerci ozellikle bu kriz gunlerinde hayatta kalmayi saglayacak bir ise sahip olmak guzel bir sey ama neden zevk aldigimiz seyi yaparak gecimimizi saglayamiyoruz? Gerci bunu basaran pek cok insan var, peki onlardan biri olmak mumkun degil mi? Onlarin bizden (benden) farki nedir? Sanirim buna verilecek tek bir cevap var: CESARET... Sevdigi isi yapan, hobisini gecim kaynagina donusturen insanlar hayat standartlarinda olusacak degisimi, karsilacaklari zorluklari, belki almak zorunda kalacaklari borclari-kredileri, kirayi gec odemeyi goze aliyorlar. Ve gordugum kadariyla guvendikleri tek sey de kendi istek ve kararliliklari. Farkettiyseniz su ana kadar hic yetenekten bahsetmedim cunku benim inancima gore herkes kendini ifade edebilmek icin gelistirebilecegi bir veya bir kac yetenekle geliyor bu dunyaya, bundan sonrasi ise calismak ve ayni seyi secmeyi surdurmek...
Anlayacaginiz eylul ayi bunlari dusunmek ve hic bir sey yapmayarak gecti :) Sadece bulundugum andan, yerden keyif almakla gecen bir rehabilitasyon devresi oldu. Ve sonra tekrar hastanede ise basladim ama isyeri degisikligi sirasinda calisma sekli degistiginden tekrar gece calisma imkanini kaybettim. Gunde 5 saatim yolda geciyor, aksam 8'de eve variyorum ve kendime ayirabilecegim sadece 2-3 saatim var cunku sabah da ise gitmek uzere erken kalkmak zorundayim. Sonuc olarak laboratuvarin sorumlu doktoru ile durumu konustum ve evde sadece 2-3 saat gecirebildigimi soyledigimde aldigim cevap:
- Bir suru insan bu sekilde yasiyor, bu senin ozel problemin... oldu. Benim cevabimsa:
- Haklisiniz bu benim ozel problemim ve haklisiniz bir suru insan boyle yasiyor ama aramizda bir fark var. Ben bu sekilde yasamak istemiyorum ! Is benim icin sadece bir gecim kaynagi, benim hayatim degil ve olmasini da istemiyorum.
Sonuc olarak artik 1 saat erken cikiyorum isten ve evde fazladan 2 saat gecirebiliyorum !!! Konusmak ve isteklerini dogru bir sekilde ortaya koymak insanin hayatini degistirebiliyor tabi karsinda seni anlayabilecek kapasitede ve iyi niyetli biri olmasi kaydiyla :)
pek keyfim yoktu gitmek istemedim, cok kizdi bana hatta kustu. Sonucta ertesi gunu katildigimiz tekne turunda mustakbel kocasi ile tanisti !!! Gordugunuz gibi her seyin bir nedeni var ve tesaduf diye bir sey yok (bence de guzel bir bahane oldu ne dersiniz ;)
Nurten & me
Her iki cifte de omur boyu mutluluklar diliyorum.
Ve gelelim 6 Kasim gunune, bugunun iki bakimdan onemi var benim icin; birincisi Sam'in dogumgunu olmasi, ikincisi ise benim ikinci hayatimin baslama gunu olmasi !!! Sam'in dogumgunu pastasini yedikten bir kac dakika sonra nefes almakta zorluk cekmeye basladim. Gecer diye bekledikce kotulesmeye basladi, oksijen acligina girdim ve ambulans cagirmak zorunda kaldik. Adada ambulans olmadigindan polis arabasi bizi iskeleye goturdu, iskeleden deniz ambulansi ile Maltepe sahiline gectik oradan da am bulansla Kartal Lutfi Kirdar hastanesine goturuldum. Serum takilip oksijen verildikten sonra kendime gelebildim ve butun geceyi hastanede gecirmek zorunda kaldik. Sanirim Sam'in gecirdigi en ilginc dogum gunuydu bu :) Asiri balgam birikmesinden tikanma yasamisim, dolayisiyla oksijen acligi ve sonucunda gelisen panik atakla durumum iyice kotulesmis. Sam'in soyledigi kadariyla gozlerime baktiginda orada olmadigimi gormus !!! Bir ara ben de her seyin bittigini dusunecek kadar sinira yaklastigimin farkindayim, hayatim bir film seridi gibi gozumun onunden gecmedi ama muthis bir hafiflik ve huzur duygusuyla kendime disaridan baktigimi gordum. Olmek boyle bir seyse korkmaya ne gerek var diye dusundugumu biliyorum ve sonra yasamayi ne kadar sevdigimi farkettim. Ilginc bir deneyimdi...
Ve simdi Madriddeyim, 1 hafta suren Andalucia gezisi sonrasi Madridde once kabiz sonra ishal olunca 2 gundur evde yatmak zorunda kaldim :( Yarin daha iyi olursam sokaklarda yuruyup fotograf cekecegim ve aksam eve donus yoluna baslayacagim...
Fotograflar ve gezinin ayrintilari, tanistigim yeni arkadaslar gelecek sayida...
Madridden sevgilerimle...
....
Hello from Madrid to everybody
I don't know where or how i should start to tell my story but of course there is a reason to not to write my blog for a long time: I am lazy... But my dear friend Mireia told me off and gave me a homework : " write your blog girl". And I am here as you see... Actually I don't have a better thing to do because of I am laying down in the bed for 2 days, in Madrid !!!
first of all i want to continue where i left at my previous post; I looked for my book in every ferry at everyday and waited for a message about the new reader but no news as you see. Don't worry I'll do it again with a new book when I returned to home. I can imagine Mireia's face now :)
Maybe you know or not but I changed my work place again. I was working at a job which they were controlling the transportation at the borders about health. This work finished for me because of the change of the general director !! don't be surprised it happens in Turkey a lot :)
Between two jobs I had a 30 days off because of paper work so I spend a month at home in september.
During this time I realized something very big: " Working is not a natural situation for humanbeings". I am serious, this is unfair that people have to go to work which they don't like to do. In fact, having a job in these crisis days is very good but why we cannot do a job which we love to do? There are some people who do that, isn't it possible for us too? What are their differences? I have only one answer: COURAGE... They risk their life standarts, they accept the potential debts, bank credits or not to be able to pay their bills or rent on time.. but they do what they love to do, working is a joy for them. They know what they want and they are stable about it. I am not talking about abilities because of in my opinion everybody comes to earth with one or more abilities which help to express themselves, the rest is working on them with insistence and keep going to chose samething !
So September passed with these toughts with doing nothing. I just enjoyed "now and here", it was like a rehabilitation perod for me. and now I returned my ex job in the hospital but i lost my night shift working opportunity, so I spend 5 hours on the way everyday ! I have only 2-3 hours for my personal life at home. I decided to talk to the chief of laboratory and we had that conversation:
- I spend 5 hours on the way and have only 2-3 hours for myself, i need a solution about that.
- There are lots of people who live like that and this is not our problem, it's your personel life and personal problem.
- I know this is my problem and I know there are a lot of people who live like that BUT, there is a difference between me and them: I don't want to live like that. Work is not my life and I don't want to spend my life at work like others. I need more time for my personal life.
In conclusion I leave work 1 hour earlier now so I have 2 more hours for my life ! I saw again that to talk about what you want and express yourself clearly can change your life. Of course there must be a person in front of you who can understand you :) I am lucky in this case...
The second one was my cousin Tolga's wedding party. It was in my parents'town so I was very happy to meet with my family specially my 10 months niece Miray. She is so cute with her 2 teeth :)
I wish to these 2 couples a long happy life together...
And finally the 6th of november; it's an important day for me because of two reasons. First of all it's the birthday of Sam and second, it's the beginning of my second life! I had difficulty of breathing when we finished to eat the birthday cake. I tought that it will pass soon and waited for a while but it get worse and I couldn't breath properly, I was in a hunger of oxygen and this caused a panic attack. I called for ambulance but there wasn't an ambulance in the island so the police car came and took me to the pier for sea ambulance. We went to the mainland quickly and the other ambulance was waiting for me there. I recovered after they gave me isolyte and oxygen in the ER but we had to spend all night in the hospital because there wasn't a way to come back to home in the night. I think it was the most interesting birthday Sam ever had... The problem was I had a lack of breathing because of the accumulation of mucus and hunger of oxygen and finally panic attack.
Sam said to me later that he saw that I wasn't there when he looked at my eyes and I felt same too. At some point I tought that I am dying but it wasn't bad, my life did not pass on my mind:) I was looking to myself from out and saw myself very light and peaceful and I had a feeling like; "If the death is something like that there is nothing to be afraid of" and I realized that how much I love the life. It was an interesting experience...
And now I am writing this post in Madrid after 1 week travel around Andalucia. I had intestine problems and had to stay at home for 2 days! But I'll go out to walk in the streets of Madrid and take photos tomorrow. Beacuse I am heading to home tomorrow evening.
Photos, writings and stories about new friends in my next post...
Keep on following me my friends...
Loves from Madrid...
29 Ağustos 2008 Cuma
Bookcrossing...
Do you like to reading? Would you lıke to see more people readıng good books? Do you think that the books are too expensive? Do you want to share a book with other people which you really liked?
So you can do what I did today; Leave one of your good books in a crowded public area including a note:
Hi,
This book was not accidentally forgotten here. It was released here for your reading. Please do the same after you finished the book. And if you can write your toughts to my blog page about the book, where and when did you find it, and where did you left after you read, we can follow its journeys (around of Istanbul or Turkey or world !!!).
Thank you & enjoy your reading
Zeytin
... This is what I did today :) Actually this is not a new thing, there is already a movement named bookcrossing all over the world. It's known as "traveling book" in Turkey. When I connected to the website of traveling book I saw that the owner of the website and books is the municipality of Istanbul, they released the books like "Harmful Habits", "Communication Within the Family", "Cultured Living in Istanbul", etc. I went to their website to register the release of my book, but they only allow registration of their own book list... well ... maybe they did not find my taste eligible as much as theirs, so I turned to the bookcrossing website this time and checked if they have any books from Turkey... There were only 11 books. Ok... I'll add my book here but now they want me to write the BCID code of my book ! I will do it if I know but...
Finally I saw that both of the websites will not to help me about my goal. So, I wrote the note above to the first page of the Herman Hesse's book named " The childhood of a Wizard" which I read last 2 days and enjoyed very much. It contains stories, easy to read, delightful and tickling your mind and senses.
The best place to release the book was the ferry of course. I get on the 17.30 ferry from Kabataş sit on the last seat at the back. I was early so it wasn't difficult to put the book on the heater near the next seat. Then I checked around like a burglar if someone aware of it but no, the family at the second seat was talking between themselves and the old guy across of my seat was doing his crossword. I decided to take more risk and took a photo of the book on the heater and named "the stories that wait for the owner" :)
I was wondering who will see the book first, will sit next to it and take it, will read and enjoy it (maybe not who knows). and I wonder if that person will send me a note about the journey of the book later... ssshhhh... there are lots of unknowns and I am so excited. My heart is beating strongly with every passenger come inside but there is still nobody to sit there. However the ferries are always crowded at fridays but not this time. I think Istanbulers called it a season already for the islands.
Within the last 5 minutes a young guy with glasses, seems 30-35, carrying a toast in his hand sit on the next seat ! and a young woman, an old guy who reads an armenian newspaper and a red faced oldish guy (I tought that he has high pressure problem) sit next to him too... Nobody paid attention to the book. Young guy kept eating his toast, young woman opened her book, armenian guy read the newspaper and red faced oldish guy decided that the seat is too sunny for him and changed the place.
Now there were three people around the book and none of them saw it, or if they saw they weren't interested, if they were interested they were either so lazy or ashamed to take and look at the book. And the book, my lovely book laid there alone and sad. Young guy finished his toast, looked around (oh he will see now!) and went out. Young woman took his place, now closer to the book but looked at me without seeing and opened her own book again.
I was losing my hopes with every minute and started to worry about the future of the book (books/me/world/universe). Maybe it would be better if I put it on the seat instead of the heater so they could see it.
Hmm... I felt that if I put it on the seat they will sit on it... If I put it on the floor they will step on it... If I put it on the seat at the outer seating of the ferry they will throw it to the sea... If I put it on the table they will throw it to the garbage as a waste from the previous passangers...
Do you think I am extremely pessimistic? Make me wrong... Please someone do make me wrong !!!
Zeytin
........
Merhaba,
Kitap okumayı seviyor musunuz? Kitap okuyan kimse kalmadığından mı şikayet ediyorsunuz? Kitaplar çok mu pahalı? Okuyup beğendiğiniz bir kitabı başkaları ile paylaşmak ister misiniz?
Öyleyse siz de benim yaptığımı yapın ve kitaplığınızdan beğendiğiniz bir kitabı kalabalık bir yerde UNUTUN! İçinde bir notla;
Merhaba,
Bu kitap burada unutulmamış sizin okumanız için bilerek bırakılmıştır. Eğer siz de okuduktan sonra nerede bıraktığınızı bookcrossing başlıklı blog yazıma yorum olarak gönderirseniz kitabın nereleri dolaştığını izleyebiliriz.
Teşekkürler ve keyifli okumalar
Zeytin
...
Bugün bunu yaptım işte :) Aslında yaptığım yeni bir şey değil. Yurtdışında bookcrossing, Türkiyede ise dolaşımdaki kitaplar olarak bilinen bir uygulama. seyyarkitap isimli siteye girdiğimde İstanbul Büyükşehir Belediyesi ve Kültür A.Ş.'nin (!) Zararlı Alışkanlıklar, Aile İçi İletişim, İstanbul'da Görgülü Yaşamak v.b tarzı kitapları dolaşıma soktuğunu gördüm. Kendi istediğim kitabı dolaşıma sokmak istediğimde ise boş bir beyaz sayfa ile karşılaştım. Kitap zevkimin çok da İBB'nin zevki ile uyuşmadığına karar vererek bu sefer yabancı da olsa bookcrossing sitesini deneyip Türkiye'de hiç dolaşımda kitap var mı diye baktığımda sadece 11 kitap olduğunu gördüm. Bari buraya ekleyeyim istediğim kitabı dedim ama bu sefer de karşıma BCID kodu çıktı !! Bir bilen var mı nedir bu? ISBN gibi bir şey mi yoksa ta kendisi mi?
22 Ağustos 2008 Cuma
Welcome on board...
20 Ağustos 2008 Çarşamba
at the beginning...
love & endless journeys
....